Dear Body

Dear Body

One Month Ago:

Dear Body,

I’m trying to listen carefully to you, but I’m still not understanding what you need from me. You told me before about needing more restorative sleep and I’m glad we’ve got that sorted out. I know there’s more, though. Please be really, really clear with me about what you need so I can take appropriate action.

Sincerely, Me


Three Weeks Ago:

“It would be worth checking your blood sugar again,” Dresden told me one morning, shortly after I woke up.

“Oh?” I’d been checking it occasionally in the mornings for a fasting number. It had been hanging out in the low 120s for years, my HbA1C test results keeping me in the prediabetes range for over two decades after increasingly severe cases of gestational diabetes with each pregnancy.

I grabbed my test kit and took a reading. 150 mg/dL. That can’t be right. I chose a test strip out of a new container and tried again. 152 mg/dL. Oy.

Maybe it was a fluke, a one-off. Or maybe not. I began testing two hours after every meal and taking a fasting reading every morning for the next several days. My after-meal numbers were largely fine, but my fasting numbers were all over 145 mg/dL.

I made a lab appointment to get my HbA1C checked. It was time, anyway.

Twenty-four hours, a high random blood glucose reading (nearly the same as my own test kit reading), and an A1C of 6.5% later, I made an appointment with my doctor.


Two Weeks Ago:

“You now have type 2 diabetes,” my doctor said. “And celiac disease. And your blood pressure medicine, even at the increased dosage, isn’t working.”

I nodded, knowing all this but not thrilled about hearing it said aloud.

“I’d like to add a second blood pressure medication, as well as add another diabetes medication to your metformin,” she continued.

From her pre-appointment email, I knew we’d be talking about this, so I’d done quite a bit of reading. I knew from my own health history that adding a calcium channel blocker was the best second medication to add for my blood pressure and that a glucagon-like peptide-1 receptor agonist (GLP-1) was the best additional diabetes medication.

I told my doctor as much, adding, “All of the other diabetes medications have weight gain as a side effect. I really don’t want to add any more weight.”

“You don’t?” she bantered back.

“I really don’t. In fact, I’d be happy to find someone else to give my extra weight to. Is that possible?”

“I’m afraid not. Losing it is your best option.”

“I’m worried about losing it,” I told her. “If I lose it, someone might find it and try to return it to me. How about I just release it back into the universe to be recycled as some other energy?”

“I like that plan,” my doctor said, finishing writing a prescription. “And this will help.”


One Week Ago:

The new/added blood pressure medicine is taking a bit of adjustment. It makes me very sleepy and dizzy, so I take it at night, but it still leaves me a bit off in the morning. Two very interesting things: my resting pulse is now easily 10+ bpm lower than it was before the added medicine and what had felt (or I had interpreted) as constant low-grade anxiety seems to be gone. Now I’m wondering if I could sense my higher pulse and that felt like anxiety. It’s certainly possible. At any rate, I feel calmer now.

My new diabetes medication is a weekly injection. Among the side effects—or benefits—it slows gastric emptying and decreases appetite. No kidding! I’m now eating one-third to one-half of what I was last week because I feel full sooner and am less hungry throughout the day. Its effect on my blood sugar began working immediately. My fasting blood glucose after the first injection was 95 mg/dL. My fasting blood sugar hasn’t been this healthy in over 22 years.



I’m still getting used to the new medications, but the blood pressure medication’s side effects are slowly easing. I still feel calm more often. I don’t have that feeling like I’m going to jump out of my skin. I’m delighted that my stomach no longer feels hunger as often. My acid reflux has lessened considerably. I can go an entire day with my blood sugar readings never going higher than the 90s. I’ve released five pounds. I’ve had no other side effects.

My way of eating remains a personalized combination of gluten-free, lower-carb, anti-inflammatory, and low caloric density (read: fruits and vegetables especially).

It’s all taking more energy at the moment to pay attention to all of these things and monitor my health, but I’m now aware that my body spoke loudly so that I could take action. These medications may be temporary until I reverse my diabetes and hypertension or they may be long-term. I’m okay with either one.

An overwhelming majority of my first- and second-degree biological family of origin had diabetes, hypertension, and heart and/or kidney disease. Many died from untreated or poorly controlled diabetes, leading to renal and heart failure. I refuse to follow in their footsteps. My genetics may have made insulin resistance, diabetes, and high blood pressure a matter of “when,” not “if,” but I have the power and the resources to manage and potentially even reverse them in a way that my body will accept.

For the record, my body has already rejected several other modalities of healing. Further, I did not know that one person could be allergic to so many essential oils, Chinese herbs, and other supplements. Even with all its faults, Western medicine is working for me right now.


This Afternoon:

Dear Body,

Thank you for speaking to me so clearly. You seem to be much happier now with more medical support. I will continue to listen carefully and will do my utmost best not to make any of my lab or test results mean anything about my worth. I appreciate you housing and guarding me through this lifetime, and I want to take good care of you. You, too, are one of my guides.

With love, Me

Talking with Dresden About Ukraine

Talking with Dresden About Ukraine

What My Body Was Really Telling Me

What My Body Was Really Telling Me

If you were to really, truly listen to your body, what would it be telling you?

For months now, I was pretty sure my body was telling me to sleep for a week or more. I heard my body say it was tired, really tired, all the time, but I didn’t really LISTEN.

It was while I was brushing my teeth a couple of nights ago that I was bemoaning my body to any guides who were listening. A recent joint dysfunction diagnosis combined with injury in that area and pain that was easily a 10 on the pain scale had me feeling like my body was falling apart or betraying me. And I said as much.

In response, Michael popped in and countered my complaints with this gem: “Your body is a finely tuned instrument. It will tell you what you need to know and when to seek help. Your job is to listen carefully to its messages.”

Well, I thought, that’s not super helpful when I don’t understand the messages I’m receiving. But I decided to try again.

Overwhelmingly, I heard my body say it was tired. Exhausted. Even all of my self–care wasn’t helping.

And then I remembered telling my partner several times that I was waking up more tired than I was when I went to sleep. I sleep with a CPAP and my AHI has been below 2, so I know it’s not apnea (always a concern with waking up more tired).

I’ve also recently been sleeping with my smartwatch on (🚫🍎) at the suggestion of my guides and it tracks my sleep. So I started looking into the statistics.

Lo and behold, I’ve been getting an average of less than 20 minutes of deep sleep each night for the past two weeks. Deep sleep is the restorative sleep when healing happens.

Well, no wonder my body says it’s exhausted.

I’d already increased the amount of magnesium I take at night, recommended by my doctor to help with the joint dysfunction/injury and related inflammation and muscle knots. I was GETTING to sleep well enough, but I often woke with night sweats or pain in my feet or for no obvious reason at all.

I’d chalked all of this up to fibromyalgia or menopause or dehydration or some combination of all three, and other than continuing to try to drink more despite not being thirsty, I figured I’d just have to live with it.

But reading an article in the journal Sleep about the effect of deep sleep deprivation on hormones revealed that in a study published in 2019, sleep deprivation also sent hormones into chaos, including vasopressin, which controls the body’s hydration levels and moderates the feeling of thirst.

Could my struggle to drink enough water be physiological? And could it be caused by sleep issues?

I also know about my body that I LOVE having something heavy over my upper arms and shoulders when I sleep. I’d been using a second blanket over my sheet and regular blanket. But I kept getting an intuitive ping about using my weighted blanket.

So, last night I arranged my regular blanket down at the foot of the bed, spread out my weighted blanket instead, and slept with just that and a sheet. There’s no padding in my weighted blanket; it’s just two layers of cotton with glass beads in between. It’s heavy (20#) but not particularly warm.

I also achieved my hydration goal yesterday for the first time in a long time (many months), drinking 85oz of uncaffeinated, calorie-free liquid (mostly water).

The net effect was that I had to get up three times to use the bathroom, but I got right back to sleep easily. And when I checked my sleep statistics this morning, an astonishing 81% of my sleep was in deep sleep!

I’m still tired today, but my body is more relaxed than it’s been in months, and I can feel in my body that I’m on the right track to better health.

For the first time in six months, I feel hopeful about my physical health. Other than my hip joint issue, all of the other tests to get to the bottom of my symptoms (chief among them being severe fatigue) were normal. My doctors say I’m fine. But my body says it’s so very, very tired. And I finally listened.

Are Guides, Angels, or God Causing Covid-19?

Are guides and angels (or is God) causing the current novel coronavirus and Covid-19 in order to get our attention or to punish us?

I’ve been asked this question now four times in the past two days. The answer is an unequivocal NO.

This is not a divine punishment, nor is it a wakeup call because we haven’t been paying attention. This is a natural extension of living in a physical world that supports replication and mutation of genetic material. It is no different, spiritually, from any other disease-causing pathogen.

Here’s where you can go with the challenges created by the current pandemic: you can really begin to see that we are all connected. You can see that what each one of us does has a ripple effect on so many others. And we get to choose if that ripple is one of disease risk or of kindness and compassion. You can acknowledge your mortality and that of everyone else, and be the best version of yourself that you know how to be in this moment.

You can do all you can with what you have from where you are.

[bctt tweet=”Each one of us has a ripple effect on so many others. And we get to choose if that ripple is one of disease risk or of kindness and compassion.” username=”soulguidesllc”]

You can practice physical distancing, but remain social via any of the many apps available now to connect us, whether Zoom, FaceTime (if you’re an Apple user), social media, Marco Polo, Skype, etc. By reaching out to others, you also bring yourself out of the internal isolation and thought-spiraling that can make you feel worse.


Are our guides sitting around on their thumbs while this is going on? While people are getting sick and dying?

No. They want very much to remind you that you are a spark of Source energy, that you matter to the world, and that you are far more powerful than you think you are. They want to support and encourage you to grow and learn and experience. And they are having a difficult time being heard above all the fear and anxiety and constant input from the media.

How can you get their message?

Limit your consumption of the media, both in terms of time and the reputation of the source. Aim for the least biased sources, with the least amount of hype. Public radio and public television are more likely to give you that than commercial broadcasting.

Make time to be. Whether in silence or yoga or meditation or prayer, take some time to be still and silent and with yourself. Open yourself to the “still, small voice.”

Stay in the moment. If your mind races off to some other place or time, bring it back gently and let those thoughts and feelings go.

Breathe. Slow and easy, relaxed and comfortable.

If you are someone who likes or is open to guided imagery, I’ve uploaded two calming meditations on Soul Guides’ new YouTube channel here:

There are also two videos there (with more to come) on shifting your energy away from anxiety and toward gratitude and love.


Beware those who spread more fear

I’ve also seen warnings from spiritually-inclined people that we should prepare for apocalyptic-like failures, such as a global internet or power blackout or fuel scarcity or long-term food (and toilet paper) shortages.

No. This is nothing more than buying into fear and creating more panic. The real threat is overwhelming the capacity and capabilities of hospitals. No zombies. No end-of-times.

Just another opportunity for you to center and ground yourself, connect with yourself and your guides, and be the gift you are to this world.

If you want to learn how to connect with your own guides, contact me for a free Illumination Session.

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